We are starting a new segment on the blog and I am excited. I have always wanted to showcase other mums who have decided to choose to raise their kids over following the traditional career path. In the future, I would love to do video chats but for now, we will start with this and Adesola will be the first on the list. I can't remember how I became acquainted with Adesola on Instagram but I am sure it was through homeschooling, and I absolutely admire her.  She shares her journey homeschooling @raising.id

1.  Please introduce yourself

Hi, my name is Adesola Lajuwomi. I’m 31. I actually dislike the term sahm because me and my kids are rarely ever at home. We unschool and learn through exploration. We moved from the UK to Nigeria in 2019 and haven’t looked back since!

2. How many kids(with ages) do you have and how long have you been a stay-at-home mum?

I have 2 children. 3yrs and 14 months. I’ve been a full-time mum since my son was born. 

3. What did you do before making the decision to be a sahm?

I was a fashion designer. Studied fashion and marketing at uni, showed a collection at Lagos Fashion Week. When I returned to the UK I was making custom orders from home. I was still sewing until I was around 8 months pregnant with my firstborn and my back had had enough lol. 

4. What was your thought process like while making the decision?

It was a battle truly. Society makes you feel like you have to do both now and I’d grown up in a household where my mum was the breadwinner and had multiple jobs. My husband and I had this conversation long before we got married about what we wanted our family roles and responsibilities to be. We had decided on a homeschooling route to instill the right foundation in our kids.

5. What has been your challenges so far? 

Moving to Abuja meant leaving all my family and friends in the UK. In the past 2 years, I’ve not had 1 day out without carrying my kids. No date night out with hubby cuz there’s no one I’d trust to leave my babies with. I don’t really see it as a challenge, I like to put things in perspective. This is just another season/phase of life for us to embrace as these young people really do grow up so quickly. 

6. What do you absolutely love about being a SAHM?

I love the flexibility it brings. I love that we can enjoy our time together, that I can be fully present in observing their growth, interests, learning. It’s such a beautiful thing. I love that we can do things together like cooking, cleaning, going to the bank, etc. and at the same time they are learning valuable life skills.

7. One of the things that a lot of the people talk about with regards to being a SAHM is "How to make money?" What has your journey with making an income been like as a SAHM?

I haven’t had to make money because we live within our means. We like to live by our priorities and values. My biggest priorities being health and making memories with my family. So I don’t joke with budgeting for healthy food (which is usually more expensive) and planning our outings. 

8. How do you currently make money (if you do)? 

I’m currently not making a dime of my own. Lol. My husband sends me his salary and I plan the house accordingly each month. He takes a percentage to cover his personal expenditures like car, golf, airtime. I budget for everything from house maintenance to our weekend family outings and it works for us. 

9. What do you think are some of the misconceptions people have about being a SAHM?


The title stayathome is just wrong in this day and age. Especially in Nigeria where a lot of people have house helps most will think what are you doing all day if you are not cooking or cleaning.  I have help but still, cook all our meals. My kids help with chores as I don’t want them to grow up not being able to do simple things for themselves. 

10. Have you gotten any negative comments about your decision?

Not really, most likely because we moved away from everyone who could comment lol. The main consensus was around having my own money “just in case”. I’m sorry but I honestly don’t think God can do great things in your life if you stay in that negative mindset of what if things don’t work out. 

11. Have you dealt with doubt or low self-esteem because of your decision?

Sometimes you’ll see things on social media that make you question am I doing enough, am I doing the best by my kids. The reality is social media is a perfectly crafted picture. Nothing more, nothing less. I’ve unfollowed a lot of “perfect people or families” for my own peace of mind. I see my kids living their best life and I’m grateful to be able to guide them as best I can. 

12. How important do you think having a supportive spouse is on this journey?

It’s impossible without a supportive partner. If you are both not 100% in this decision then you will consistently be battling with the notion that you need to do everything. It’s not possible to put your all in multiple avenues. One will suffer. 

13. What do you do to take care of yourself/have fun? 

I’ve found that you don’t have to be by yourself for self-care. We love eating out and trying different foods. I actually love spending time and have lots of fun with my kids. Every day is an adventure. They’ll come with me to the hair salon or nail bar the same way I’ll go with them to the park or zoo. 

14. What advice would you give a mum who is currently thinking of becoming a sahm?

Have a proper conversation with your partner. It’s a decision that you both have to fully commit to. Discuss what will have to give if you don’t have 2 salaries, budget and plan. What are your priorities as a family? 

Sometimes you may doubt yourself but follow your heart, trust God and live every day full of purpose.  

Are you a stay at home mum and would love to share your journey with us? Please send a mail to thecuddleblog@gmail.com stating your interest.