When you are a new mum in the phase with your new baby you think this is just the hardest phase because you are sleep deprived with a demanding baby then BAM!!! Toddlerhood! Terrific 2s and 3s and then you will take your words back and hoped that you enjoyed their babyhood some more.

Toddlers are a HANDFULL, they are sweet, cuddly, affectionate but boy!! they also come with their issues, mostly expected behaviour but that doesn't make all of it acceptable. We as positive parents have to now find a way to balance dealing with them as developing children and managing our expectations.

Some of the issues you might deal with your child in the toddler phase are;
  • Not doing what you want them to do 
  • Throwing things 
  • Tantrums for no reason (but there's usually a reason if you dig deep)
  • Hitting 
  • Being defiant 
At this stage, these are expected behaviours but the big question is "How do I get my child to do what I want?"
  1. Find out what they love and use that to your advantage: By now, you already know what your child is interested in e.g dolls, wheels, cars, stuffed animals now use that thing they love to get them to do what you want without being too serious. An example is this, your child doesn't want to go take a bath, you know they are interested in dolls, you tell them "Hey baby, can we go take a bath for *insert dolls name here*?" more than half the time I tried this with my toddler and it works 90% of the time. You can get creative with the alternative to connected to what you want them to do. This trick is not to threaten to take away privileges, it is just to get them interested in what you want them to do.
  2. Use it as a teachable moment: If they are running and you want them to walk, instead of shouting "Don't run" how about teaching what you want them to do? "Can you please walk?", "Can you use your inner voice" "Put the toy down gently" "Use your gentle hands" "Hands are not for hitting" "You can stump your feet when you are upset or fold your arms" This way they learn the appropriate behaviour instead of just telling them what NOT to do. Teach them exactly what they should do. 
  3. Model the behaviour you want to see: You are the model they see if you throw a tantrum when you are upset (Shout, hit) don't expect them to do otherwise. I have become a person that says "I am so upset right now, give me some time" or I fold my hands and pout and say "Mummy is sad" to communicate when I am not happy about something. I am also learning not to react and also explain. If you want your child to be empathetic, show empathy. What they see makes more impression than what they hear. 
  4. Make it fun: Children just want to play, you'd notice how they make everything into a game, you can also do that to make it a fun way for them to listen to you, the challenge is that we are not very patient but if we do take our impatience out of the way, it can actually be a fun experience. 
  5. Give exact positive praise for the behaviour exhibited: Praise the behaviour you see, "You didn't throw something when you were upset, great job" "I am so proud of you for telling mummy your feelings instead of throwing a tantrum" instead of the general "Good job" "High five" mention the exact thing you are praising them for.
I hope these tips help you on your journey with your toddler. Listen to more behaviour management  (click link) here tips by @Weandthechildren 

What behaviour will you like to see less of in your child?