We have realised that being a stay-at-home mum is a career and over the next couple of sahm articles we would talk about how we can define all these parts of our lives to create a wholesome experience for us in our stay-at-home-mum season.

Today our focus will be on family life;

We look at how to define your family in these 4 categories;

- Define the family values: This can not be done by you alone but you can facilitate the process. Prepare your spouse and children(if they are old enough) in advance for a family meeting where you are all going to discuss what your values are and the way everyone can stick to those values. Set time aside on a Saturday or Sunday to make this happen. When you are done you will have the final list printed and posted everywhere in the house as a reminder.

Here are a few articles to help with the process:
Article 1
Article 2

It is important to note that the values will continue to evolve over time and this is a new addition, you or your kids may not instantly get it but the values will be imbibed by constantly reinforcing it which is why everyone must be involved in the process.

- Define the family goals: We set individual goals, career goals, financial goals etc but do we remember to set the family goals? What do we want to achieve as a family? It is important that the family has something they are working on together this helps to increase the bond and gives you a sense of direction as a family.
Here are a few articles to help you get started;

Article 1
Article 2

- Define how your family runs: You take some time to define how your family will run;

Here are some questions to answer to define this; 

1. Will you get domestic help?
2. When will your kids wake up? 
3. If you have domestic help, how will they conduct themselves (e.g no phones while they work, deep clean every month, change bedsheet every week, cobwebs, no dishes overnight,  etc.) 
4. How do we go to market? When do we go to the market (weekly, monthly), How do we store food?
5. What is the monthly budget to keep the home running?  

- Schedules & Routines: A routine something you do every day and a schedule is a documentation of how your day will go. This is one of my favourites, creating routines and schedules. Children thrive on routines and it is important that we put our kids in a routine if we haven't already and stick with it. You'd see how much happier they will be. Your routine will be different based on what you decide to do, for example, my routine with my son as a homeschooling mum will be different from a mum who has her child in school. The most important thing is to incorporate all the aspects of your life into it and stick with it.

Here are a few articles to help
Article 1

Having a schedule for everything you want to do each day is also important especially when you stay at home, it feels like the work never ends and there is a tendency to continue without putting the breaks in, it also helps you to be productive and keep track of all your activities. Here is how I create a weekly schedule that I follow;

• Every Sunday I take some time out to plan my week and review my last week. 
• I think through and also based on commitment define where we are going. E.g Events, swimming class, mummy & me class etc. 
• After putting in a journal (I use Power planner) you can also insert into your google calendar or download a scheduling app which will send you reminders. 
• Follow through! 

Are you a stay-at-home mum? How do you define your family life?

• Numeracy: Count family members/ Count stairs
• Science: Sensory Bin with passport photographs of everyone and identify
• Craft: House with figures of everyone who lives in it / Family Tree /
• Fine motor skills: Colour drop, Hanging clothes/socks
• Gross motor skills: Playground
• Cooking: Setting table, bake a cookie for the family
• Books to read: (I found that the book I wanted to read was showing same-sex families - I don't want to read that to my child)
• Trip: Cousins House
• Screen: Family Song
• Music: Finger family song
• Bible: Jacob - watching the story or telling the story of Jacob

• Numeracy: Count how many rooms, stairs, count everything countable in the home
• Science: Where do I do what?
• Craft: House with figures of everyone who lives in it.
• Fine motor skills:
• Gross motor skills: Playground, run, jump
• Cooking:
• Books to read: In a people house
• Trip: Explore our neighbourhood, Talk about how to get 'home'
• Screen:
• Music:
• Bible:

I am so excited about this!

When I started on this journey with my son, I never imagine I would be someone trying to sell anything. I would go into stores and all these materials will be expensive and you would have 5k and would only leave with about 4 items. Sigh!

I found someone who showed me where to get these materials are a cheaper rate and I was wowed! I know alot of people won't either have the time or the energy to do market runs and my hope is that more families do more play-based activities with their kids, which is why I am introducing the cuddle play box package.

This will be the first package that will go out, but they will range from 7,500 - 20,000.

I really wanted the least to be 5,000 but going into the market, I knew it won't be possible. I now understand when people say when you have passion for something it doesn't feel like work. It was so exciting putting the first box together for my sister.

• Plastic Box 
• Feather 
• Top Bond Glue
• A Box of Monami Paint (12 Colours)
• A Pack of Paint Brush (12 Brushes)
• 1 pack of Goggly eyes 
• 1 Safety Scissors 
• 5 Cardboards
• 10 Paper Plates 
• 2 Foams
• Creative Sticks (Coloured and Plain)
• 1 pack of pom poms
• 4 Sample Activities Document

The holiday is upon us!

Many mums are worried, they are wondering what will I do with this child(ren) throughout this holiday?

Well, that is why I am here!

I am not here to give you a list of activities to do but to help you see that there is so much more that can be done with your kids. I know some mums already do but some other mums will be just be thinking of doing their homework and letting them bing watch tv but how do we get out of that mode?

1. You have to re-think play & the mess they make: We are so focused on academics and what we experienced play as that we think play is anything that children do that takes them away from school work. If you still think like that you have to re-think play. Play is the work of a child and seeing and knowing (based on research) that children learn so much from playing we should encourage them to actually play but what we do as parents it to guide the play and be intentional about it.  Play is not just pouring sand and swinging, it is an opportunity to learn. For example, a child dipping a foam in water and squeezing it on the floor is not just making a mess but working his/her fine motor skill which will help in writing in future, a child feeding him/herself is not making a mess but learning focus, hand to mouth coordination. We have to see beyond the mundane and discover what they are learning in the process so we can encourage it and know that it will come with a mess.

2. Plan: The only reason why we become frustrated is that we didn't plan and anticipate what would come next. You know how long the holiday will be, plan and as you are going into the day resolve to not get angry.
Segment the day into morning/afternoon/night and before you know it the day is over.

Morning is easy, cook breakfast together, let them set the table or serve (depending on the age), do circle time - pray together, let them sing rhymes or sing to them (age dependent), read a book, dance,

Afternoon, plan for crafts (tons of ideas online), nap, cook lunch together, work on a project, some children won't mind another book, an outing(museum, zoo, parks), holiday clubs, play dates, screen time.

Evening; Outdoor play, water play (tons of ideas online), playground, night routine.

Just take time out to fill out what will be done each day of the week. It is also a plan that can be given to a nanny if you are going to be at work and join in the fun when you get back. With this plan there would be less tv.



3. Work on a Project: This one is for the parents with a 9-5 and older kids, the younger ones are easier to please. Pick a project most especially something that doesn't seem like homework lol. Type in Google "fun projects to do with (age of your child)" and boom! Just ensure you check in with them before you settle on the exact ones you want to do. You can then work on the project with them when you get back from work.

4. If all fails, take them to grandmas or bring them to my house. Lol!

What are you going to be doing this holiday?

1. Family Life: Here you will define how you want your family life to run such that there will and should be progress. This will include, defining what your family stands for, Goals for the family per-time, defining the process with which your family runs, creating routines and schedules for the family, defining how the domestic staff works
2. Business/Job/Hobby (If it applies): Here you will create the road map for either starting your business, getting back into the workforce, starting your hobby and having clear action steps on what to do, timelines and deliverables.
3. Children: Here you track your children, their routine, schedule, academics, values, shortcomings, create action steps on what needs to be done with each child to make them the well-rounded child you want to release to the society.
4. Personal Development: Here you define your personal development goals, what you need to achieve those goals, how you want to achieve it and action steps.
5. Spirituality: Here you map out how you will actively develop your relationship with God, seek opportunities to express your gifts, seek opportunities to serve others and love!

Have you considered being a stay-at-home mum as a career? Do you have a defined career path?